The Art of Unforgiveness

That moment, that moment when the pain of your knife coursed through my body

That moment where the fabric of our intertwining was ripped apart

That moment when the bonds that held us together fell apart,

Was the moment I realized that that moment had become an altar in my mind

The altar was my prison,

The altar in front of which I would pray for permission to be happy

For permission to let you go

The altar in front of which I would seek validation but leave feeling empty

But…..

One day I looked down and I saw who’s hand was on the knife

I saw who continued to push the sharp and painful ridges of the blade deep into my soul

That hand was mine

You gave me the knife, you gave me the gun and I willingly used it upon myself

I gave you the keys to my heart and my mind,

I gave you power, kingship, ownership over what you did not create

Create fearful and wonderfully.

That knife,

First name Anger

Last name Bitterness

I gave it life and I gave it power instead of setting it down

Instead of throwing it down and leaving it powerless,

Leaving it aside, setting it aside like the tumour it is.

Yet I used it,

I let it cut deep into my soul

Pouring out the happiness and peace it once stored

Transplanting all the peace that once dwelt within me to an object,

A mindset with no purpose.

I don’t blame you, I gave you the power

I don’t blame you, I gave you the keys

I don’t blame you, I created you.

Published by Peju-Anike

This site is a small collection of my thoughts, experiences & inspirations. I hope you are inspired and encouraged by my musings. Your thoughts, ideas and interpretations are always welcome. Love Peju-Anike

One thought on “The Art of Unforgiveness

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